5 things not to do with people with Alzheimer’s
by
Romina Sarcletti
5 things not to do with people with Alzheimer’s: a practical guide for carers
Caring for someone with Alzheimer’s or dementia means learning a new way of communicating, where emotion matters more than logic. The brain can no longer interpret reality correctly: this is why it is essential to adapt our behaviour to avoid anxiety, fear and aggression.
In this guide, you will discover 5 mistakes to avoid when dealing with people with Alzheimer’s, which will help improve your relationship and the quality of daily life.
-
Do not introduce new objects or technologies
One of the most common mistakes is trying to simplify life by introducing new devices (remote controls, telephones, household appliances).
👉 In reality:
Procedural memory (automatic actions) is the last to deteriorate
The ability to learn new things is among the first to be compromised
Changing objects or habits can lead to:
- confusion
- frustration
- a sense of helplessness
Tip: keep the environment as familiar as possible. If something breaks, replace it with an object similar in shape and function.
-
Do not discuss the illness in front of them
Discussing symptoms, hygiene issues or the costs of care in front of the person is a mistake.
Even if their memory is impaired, people with Alzheimer’s:
- perceive emotions
- pick up on tension and concerns
- may feel like a burden
This can increase the risk of:
- depression
- agitation
- behavioural disturbances
Tip: only discuss these topics when the person is not present
-
Avoid questions beginning with “why”
Questions beginning with “why” require analytical and abstract thinking skills that Alzheimer’s impairs.
This can cause:
- anxiety
- frustration
- made-up answers (confabulation)
- defensive or aggressive reactions
Example:
❌ “Why are you crying?”
✅ “How are you feeling right now?”
Tip: use simple, concrete and reassuring questions.
-
Do not approach from behind or from the side
As dementia progresses, the field of vision narrows (tunnel vision).
Approaching from behind or from the side can:
- startle the person
- cause confusion
- trigger sudden reactions
Tip: always approach from the front, slowly and maintaining eye contact.
-
Do not correct confabulations
People with Alzheimer’s may recount events that never happened or confuse identities.
It is important to understand that:
- they are not lying
- the brain is trying to ‘fill in the gaps’ in their memory
Correcting them can:
- increase anxiety
- cause disorientation
- trigger fear
Tip: enter their world, validate their emotions and respond with empathy.
Knowing what not to do with a person with Alzheimer’s is just as important as knowing what to do. Small changes in the carer’s behaviour can reduce stress and significantly improve quality of life.
Adapting to their way of perceiving the world is not just helpful: it is essential.
